Tuesday, March 12, 2013

jars of clay

This week our God-sized dreams question from Holley was, What do you really want more of in your life?  Will you dare to say it out loud?  Hint: it probably means having less of something {ex: more joy, less stress}. 

As I quieted myself to listen to the answer to Holley’s question, this verse came to mind:

“This is what the Sovereign Lord, the Holy One of Israel, says: In repentance and rest is your salvation, in quietness and trust is your strength, but you would have none of it.” Isaiah 30:15, NIV

In the quietness of my heart, I realized that I desire more quiet confidence, less fear of failure.

I do not desire a confidence based on my own abilities, but confidence that God has made me who I am for a reason and that He has blessed, disciplined and loved me into someone who looks a little more like Jesus today than I did yesterday.

I remembered this awesome quote from Holley’s recently released book You’re Made for a God-sized Dream that I highlighted on my Kindle:

You are who you are for a reason.  God could have designed you in any way that he wanted.  After all, he spoke the world into being.  Customizing you wasn’t a challenge.  So why would he create you in a way that didn’t match up with the biggest dreams he has for your life?”

…You are who you are for a reason…really, God?  I am fearful, I am not naturally thin, I say stupid things, I am prone to doubt…

It does not come easy for me to believe good things about my self or my abilities.  For years after we married, I would periodically and very seriously ask my husband to remind me again why he married me, what he possibly saw in me, because I had no eyes to see such things in myself.

This whole God-sized dream thing has pressed hard into this area of my life, helping me to cautiously believe in the good things God has put in me, and reminding me that God is doing a good work in me that He will bring to completion in His time.

I may no longer pigeonhole my husband monthly to ask him why he married me, but I know that I do not regularly living out of a quiet core of confidence.  And I still have a tendency toward fear of failure.

God doesn't want me to gain confidence so that I feel good about myself.  No, His plan is much better, much greater.  His plan is to bring glory to Himself, and the truth is that He uses folks just like you and me to do so:

“But we have this treasure in jars of clay to show that this all-surpassing power is from God and not from us.” 2 Corinthians 4:7


  1. I love this, Amy. It's so hard to see the good that God created in ourselves sometimes, isn't it? I love the quote from Holley's book that you is such a reminder to me that with some of the crazy quirks God has given me, there must be a pretty unique plan just for me! :) And after reading this, I'm even more excited to meet you! I so appreciate your heart...thank you for sharing it with us today. Blessings on your day! :)

    1. Thanks, Mel! Your comment reminded me of a conversation I had with my girls yesterday, about how unique we all are and how creative God is. Then we started thinking about ALL the people on the earth, and all the people who have ever lived, each one of us being uniquely pretty much blew our minds! I am inspired by the creativity of God that I see in people around me, and I am grateful that He is helping me to see that I can include myself in that group :). Enjoy your day! Has Spring sprung where you live?

  2. Amy, I was reading just this passage from this morning. I love this..."God doesn't want me to gain confidence so that I feel good about myself. No, His plan is much better, much greater. His plan is to bring glory to Himself, and the truth is that He uses folks just like you and me to do so..." I am so glad He folds us into His Perfect plans.
    Peace and good to you.

  3. Love, love, love your train of thought and all the verses you shared, spot on, and I can so relate to that desire for a quiet confidence in who God made me...Blessings to you, and I want to affirm that I see that confidence blooming in your writing, my friend :)